Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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