if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
The power of my boobs compel you
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
