somebody snuck up and got me drunk
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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