Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
