My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
