Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
