I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
