just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
