32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
So vagazzling was a success
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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