And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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