super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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