Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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