She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
