oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
