He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
