FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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