i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Randomize
