Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
