The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize