She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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