Pappa wants mamma naked
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
