If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
