Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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