So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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