That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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