Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
