What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
