Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
