i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
only you would photoshop your dick
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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