my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
stop calling my apartment porn island.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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