You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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