batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
tell me about the fingering
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