If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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