I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
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