i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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