im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
why do cheetos always look like penises
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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