her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
