the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
When did angry sex become our thing?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize