ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize