I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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