Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
