Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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