areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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