I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize