she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Randomize
