I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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