your room smells of hookers.
And success
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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