i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Randomize
