Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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