Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
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