i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
