hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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